Is there a girl whose heart you want to win but just have no idea how to go about doing so? Have you ever wondered what it is about some guys who seem to be able to steal girls’ hearts so easily? Well, I believe that no one else could be in a better position to write about that matter than us, girls. True, every girl has her standards when it comes to guys, but there are general factors about men that can turn any girl off.
The list I have compiled is by no means comprehensive. However, I hope you find it helpful in determining which aspect of your approach you could work on (and win the heart of that lady you’re crushing on).
- Lend an ear and chat with me
Just in case you haven’t noticed it yet, girls love to talk—a lot. So we would be very grateful if you also do your part in listening and interacting with us. Now the latter part of the preceding sentence is very important to us—interacting. Have you ever tried being with someone who just listened to you for almost the entire time and only spoke in grunts? I’m sure you did not greatly enjoy the company of that person. The same thing goes for us, women. Although we love to talk, we hate having to be the only ones making the effort of having a conversation.
The bottom line is: Learn to interact and do it well. Think of something interesting to say other than complimenting us for how we look. We want conversations we could stay up until the wee hours in the morning for.
- Do not ever be a showoff
Yes, we are happy to hear you out. We enjoy listening to your stories. However, we do not want to hear about how rich you have made yourself or about the latest car model that you are driving. We don’t enjoy having to listen to you talk about how smart you are. You may think that talking about your achievements in life would impress us. Truthfully, however, doing just that would only get you nowhere near us for a second date. In fact, hearing you praise yourself too much will not make us proud of you. If anything, such misplaced pride in your accomplishments would only push us away from you. We understand that you want to impress us, and we appreciate the effort. However, we want to give you a friendly advice. If you want to impress us, you would have to do so subtly. You do not need to be flashy. The way you dress up, the place you take us to, the attention you show us—those things are going to be more than enough to woo our hearts.
- Try your best to look presentable
Has anyone ever told you that women are visual too? Of course, you guys will always be more visual than us girls, but we do take note of how you look. While not all of us have a trendy fashion sense, we do appreciate it when you turn up on our doorstep looking very presentable. You don’t have to wear a coat and tie every time you take us out on a date (except maybe for special nights); looking neat and respectable will suffice for us.
We also would appreciate it if you could work on looking fit. We don’t expect you to look like a bodybuilder, but we would love to see some muscles too. Again, I’m not saying that you have to go to the gym, but if you could work on having abs, that would be a great bonus for us. If you think your workouts are not working for you because your testosterone levels are not that high, you could try consulting a fitness specialist. Your specialist may recommend a natural testosterone booster to help you get your body in excellent shape.
- Act every inch of the gentleman you are
Contrary to public belief, women do not think that chivalry is dead. We love small acts of gallantry more than we like showy displays of affection. Opening the car door for us, pulling us a chair, staying on the side of the road to keep us safe—such small acts are enough to melt our hearts. The thing is that we girls are not difficult to please at all. You do not have to spend a hundred bucks for us to appreciate your presence. We simply need you to show us that we matter to you. We need to feel convinced that you care about us because of who we are and not what we could offer you (if anything). When you show us that you care for our welfare, you do not only earn our affection—you also earn our trust.
You need to keep in mind that no matter how independent or strong a woman is, she is still an emotional being. She may look tough as nails, but your chivalry can soften her up more than your words could.
- Stop talking about your ex
Other than guys boasting about their achievements in life, another thing that we cannot stand is hearing guys talk about their exes. It’s just so unfair for us to be sitting there with you, supposedly enjoying a moment where we could get to know you, and ending up listening to tales of how awesome your ex was. Women have the tendency to be jealous (not that I am trying to generalize), or if not jealous, be competitive. We’re sure that she was awesome, but we honestly don’t want to feel that we have to live up to her legacy. I’m pretty sure that the same thing goes for you too, guys. No matter how much you may want to listen to us, I know you hate having to hear us talk about how perfect our ex was.
The bottom line is this: We would rather that you talk about the weather outside than hear you talk about your ex for almost the entire time that we are together.